All Relationships are Different

Your friend Christina tells you that if he really loved you he wouldn’t do that.

Joyce tells you that you need to give him an ultimatum and stop this shit once and for all.

Your friend Debbie chimes in and tells you that all couples fight and that someone needs to break the ice so it may as well be you because most guys out there are assholes and your man has more good than bad qualities.

Now they mean well (and some friends don’t, but that is another topic altogether) but keep in mind that Christina hasn’t been in a relationship in 2 years because she is so high maintenance, Joyce is in a volatile on/off relationship for 6 years and counting because both she and her boyfriend are addicted to drama, and Debbie is a doormat who let’s her boyfriend treat her like crap.

Should you take advice from these people? Would you take diet advice from an obese person? No. So why would you take relationship advice from people in relationships you would rather shoot yourself than be in?

Even if all of them were in perfect relationships, they are THEM and you are YOU. Their men are THEIR men, and yours is YOURS. Everyone is different, so what works for them won’t always work for you.

Each persons’ motives for doing something are different One guy may not call when he says he is going to because he doesn’t consider you that important, but another guy may not call because he isn’t really prompt and good at calling and doesn’t feel the need to talk everyday.

We all go to the bank, but one of us may go because we need to take out money, one of us may need to deposit money, one of us may be paying a bill, another getting their account balance. We are all doing the same thing but for different REASONS.

So always remember, you must find the “motive” for the man in YOUR life because his can be different from someone else. Don’t you hate when men say “well you women always ___”. You immediately think “I am not like that, don’t you dare say that”. It’s the same with men. Not all of them will do the same thing for different reasons, so you shouldn’t ASSUME they are just because your friend told you why her boyfriend does/says something.

You need to assess each man and each relationship SEPARATELY. Many men and women play the same games, but for different reasons and with some different tactics. One size does not fit all when it comes to relationship advice, so take what your friends say with a grain of salt. They are not professionals, they are emotionally attached to you, and may be going through some shit in their own relationships that taint their viewpoint. So listen to what they have to say, but remember, it is their opinion, not fact.